Milky Bar – Gold

I have always hated the Milky Bar Kid – always felt that the bloke was ill suited for the unforgiving, oft violent, world that was the wild west. Although watching a few of the old adverts again – he usually was beating up on other young kids, and I have to admit that he was one hell of a shot. Maybe not the most intimidating of gunslingers, but I guess he was one of the best – never heard of Wyatt Earp spelling out “Milky Bar” with bullet holes. Still not buying that milky, pale complexion would have lasted more than 39 seconds in the harsh desert sun though.

What is this though? Milky Bar Kid gone on a Gold Rush or some sh1t? I don’t know what the canon in Milky Bar wild west world is…

Milky Bar is a white chocolate bar that has been around since 1936, which was a long time ago, but not quite as old as wild west. Currently the claim on the packaging is that it is “made with real milk goodness”. Why doesn’t it just say “made with milk”? Some of the information seems redundant. No one is going to think it was “made with synthetic milk evil” although I would immediately buy any product claiming that!

Now Milky Bar is adding gold to their bar… Aw no, it is just caramel, or wait again, it says “Creamy Caramelised Taste” so not really caramel, just the taste has been caramelised? 🤔


I don’t know what the hell any of this means, just words engineered to sell the bar, perhaps. I am just going to eat it.

This was much better than I thought it would be. Was kind of hoping to get through this review without mentioning *that* other caramel milk bar, but I can’t go without comparing the two. This is actually about the same – any advantage being a matter of pure preference.

I would say the caramilk has a creamier texture where as Milky Bar Gold has an aftertaste, I didn’t notice in the competition, that reminds me a bit of ice cream. Also, not sure if my tooth has sweetened up, and it has been a while since I tried that other one – but although this was intensely sweet, I didn’t find it as offensive.

The Gold taste that’s in Milky Bar – 7/10

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